Being that it’s black history month I wanted to take this opportunity to remind every black woman that read this of just how beautiful you are. I hope that you are encouraged by it.
Accept you for you – you are enough.
The first thing that I believe to be necessary for feeling beautiful in the skin you’re in is by accepting who you are. This means looking in the mirror and being able to identify that all of your unique features make you who you are. God made us all in his image, and God doesn’t have any blemishes, spots or creases, yet we dig so deeply to find any and everything that’s wrong about ourselves, whether it be a big nose, flat bum or flat chest. All of which society have made us become aware of which leads to major insecurities. Most importantly, recognise that your beauty does not require the validation of others. You’d be surprised that although social media sites such as Instagram are all about posting pictures to an audience, you’ll find that quite often the people that post the most who are the most insecure. Would you still feel beautiful without the “likes” and comments I’ve seen people go as far as deleting their pictures because they didn’t get enough “likes”.
It’s so important that you grow to be comfortable with your natural state. When is the last time you had your natural hair or didn’t wear any make-up? There is absolutely nothing wrong with wearing extensions or weave, in fact black women are so blessed that we can do so many different hairstyles because of our amazing hair texture. My question however is when was the last time you were just – you. Bare and beautiful. Some of us have become so accustomed to the make-up and fake hair that we no longer see ourselves as beautiful without them. If this is you, pray about it. Ask God to help you to see yourself how he sees you, perfect without the mask that you wear, the only face that feels confident with being around other people. Let yourself free. It’s not about what other people think about your looks it’s about what God says about you, and he has called you perfect.
Become beautiful within
With this being said however, we cannot rely on our external beauty. It may sound cliché but beauty truly does start from within. Proverbs 31:30 reads “Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised. Our spirit man, our hearts, our thoughts and our character all stem from within. We ought to spend more time making a conscious effort to make these things beautiful. Our outer beauty goes unnoticed if we do not have inner beauty standing by its side. So yes spend time making yourself look glamorous, but before this take some time to groom your character. Write a list of all the things you recognise that need changing, this can be hard, as it’s very difficult to face that you need to change. Pretty hurts. The famous saying beauty is pain is very true. It is painful to change your ugly ways, but if you truly want to be beautiful it will take threading, waxing, and shaving away that old self. If you have a hard time identifying what these characteristics are that need being brushed away, ask someone who will be honest with you and highlight these out, a person who is not going to take pleasure in pointing out your flaws for the wrong reasons. Then pray about these and ask God to transform your character.
Affirmation – Speak life
God tells us in his word that out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks, and that people will know us by our fruits. We walk in power and authority, the same authority that our father has which he invested in us through his son Christ Jesus. Our words build our lives and surroundings. In Genesis God created the world by calling things into being. We have the same capacity of power to do these things, this is why sometimes we can subconsciously speak negativity into our lives, and then we wonder why we have such low self-esteem. It’s because we underestimate just how much power we have in the things we say. We must therefore speak affirmative words over our lives.
A few daily declarations:
“I AM MADE IN GOD’S IMAGE. I AM BEAUTIFUL”
“I AM FEARFULY AND WONDERFULLY MADE”
“MY DARK SKIN IS GLORIOUS”
“I AM WORTHY”
I encourage you to look in the mirror every day this week and make these three declarations. The more you speak these things into the atmosphere and hear them back, the more you will start to believe what God has said about you. Silence what society says about you, your skin or how beautiful you are according to them The only valuable opinion is your creator’s and he has called you BEAUTIFUL.
HAPPY BLACK HISTORY MONTH QUEEN, SHINE ON!
If you enjoy reading and learning purchase a copy of my mum Dr Angela Herbert MB E’s book on Martin Luther King and education published by Springer, a phenomenal black woman who has made a difference.